Recommended Reading
Below is a list of books that have been recommended to me over the years. Please contact me if you have any particular recommendations that may be suitable for this page.
Adult recommended reading
For working through the impact for both partners of an affair, and making decisions for your short, medium and long term future
There is nothing quite like the pain and shock caused when a partner has been unfaithful. The hurt partner often experiences a profound loss of self-respect and falls into a depression that can last for years. For the relationship, infidelity is often a death blow. "After the Affair" is the first book to help readers survive this crisis.
Written by a clinical psychologist, it guides both hurt and unfaithful partners through the three stages of healing: normalizing feelings, deciding whether to recommit and revitalizing the relationship. It provides proven, practical advice to help the couple change their behavior toward each other, cultivate trust and forgiveness and build a healthier, more conscious intimate partnership.
A groundbreaking look at improving desire, arousal, and sexual satisfaction through mindfulness. Studies show that approximately half of all women experience some kind of sexual difficulty at one point in their lives, with lack of interest in sex being by far the most common--and the most distressing. And when sex suffers, so do all other areas of life, including mood, self-confidence, satisfaction with one's relationship, and general well-being.
But it doesn't have to be that way. In Better Sex Through Mindfulness, acclaimed psychologist and sex researcher Dr. Lori Brotto offers a groundbreaking approach to improving desire, arousal, and satisfaction inside--and outside--of the bedroom. A pioneer in the use of mindfulness for treating sexual difficulties, Brotto has helped hundreds of women cultivate more exciting, fulfilling sexual experiences. In this accessible, relatable book, she takes her work out of the clinic and onto the page to provide simple, effective exercises that readers can do on their own to cultivate desire and increase sexual enjoyment.
She also explores the various reasons for sexual problems, such as stress and our incessant multitasking, and tells the stories of many of the women she has treated over the years. With an eye to the latest research, she explains how mindfulness can help women feel more in tune with themselves and their partner, sense feelings in a more intense way, and experience greater sexual pleasure.
Brotto believes that satisfying sex is simply not possible without mindfulness. As she says, "Mindfulness is transformational." This book will help you achieve your goal, whether you want to overcome a sexual difficulty or simply give your love life an extra boost.
The loss affects bereaved parents emotionally, physically, mentally, spiritually and socially. It makes more demands on them than most others ever realise.
Many bereaved parents say that the only people who can ever genuinely begin to understand what it’s like for them are other bereaved parents. Hearing from others who have ‘been there’ can make all the difference. For this reason, Beyond Words is a handbook that features the honest words, perspectives and suggestions of many bereaved parents. It also offers useful information about managing grief, support options and ideas that may be helpful on the grief journey.
It is comforting, encouraging, informative and practical.
It will also provide understanding and insights to professionals and others seeking to effectively support bereaved parents.
If you are interested in this book, you may like to look at Death Without Warning which offers information and support after any kind of sudden or unexpected death."
Check them out from the link above.
Blended families face unique challenges, and sadly, good intentions aren’t always enough. With so many complex relationships involved, all the normal rules for family life change, even how you apply something as simple as the five love languages.
That’s why Gary Chapman, the bestselling author of The 5 Love Languages® and national expert on stepfamilies, Ron Deal, join together in this book to teach you how the five love languages can help your blended family.
About the unique dynamics of stepfamilies
How to overcome fear and trust issues in marriage
How to develop healthy parenting and step-parenting practices
How the love languages should, and should not, be applied
You're going to face many challenges, but with the right strategies and smart work, your family can be stronger and healthier together.
This groundbreaking book explains why women experience burnout differently than men-and provides a simple, science-based plan to help women minimize stress, manage emotions, and live a more joyful life.
Burnout. Many women in America have experienced it. What's expected of women and what it's really like to be a woman in today's world are two very different things-and women exhaust themselves trying to close the gap between them. How can you "love your body" when every magazine cover has ten diet tips for becoming "your best self"? How do you "lean in" at work when you're already operating at 110 percent and aren't recognized for it? How can you live happily and healthily in a sexist world that is constantly telling you you're too fat, too needy, too noisy, and too selfish?
Sisters Emily Nagoski, PhD, and Amelia Nagoski, DMA, are here to help end the cycle of feeling overwhelmed and exhausted. Instead of asking us to ignore the very real obstacles and societal pressures that stand between women and well-being, they explain with compassion and optimism what we're up against-and show us how to fight back. In these pages you'll learn
what you can do to complete the biological stress cycle-and return your body to a state of relaxation
how to manage the "monitor" in your brain that regulates the emotion of frustration
how the Bikini Industrial Complex makes it difficult for women to love their bodies-and how to defend yourself against it
why rest, human connection, and befriending your inner critic are keys to recovering and preventing burnout
With the help of eye-opening science, prescriptive advice, and helpful worksheets and exercises, all women will find something transformative in these pages-and will be empowered to create positive change. Emily and Amelia aren't here to preach the broad platitudes of expensive self-care or insist that we strive for the impossible goal of "having it all." Instead, they tell us that we are enough, just as we are-and that wellness, true wellness, is within our reach.
Too many men are suffering with their emotional health issues in silence, and male suicide rates are high. Men are affected by everyday stress, high workloads, anxiety and depression, loss of confidence or identity, relationship breakdowns, family disruption, addictions and trauma — just the same as women. But society has placed a stigma on men’s mental health. Men have found it hard to reach out in the past because of a sense of shame that comes from our society. But men are changing. They are re-defining what it is to be ‘strong’, and are more open to understanding their emotions and reaching out for help.
The Changing Man: A Mental Health Guide explores a range of issues affecting men’s emotional health and wellbeing, and provides a collection of tried and tested tools to ensure no man suffers in silence again. From dealing with addiction, to bettering relationships, overcoming depression, working through sexuality concerns and realising that it is okay not to be okay, The Changing Man’s methods and knowledge may just change your emotional health for the better. No shame. No silence. No anger.
A revised and updated edition of Emily Nagoski's game-changing New York Times bestseller Come As You Are, featuring new information and research on mindfulness, desire, and pleasure that will radically transform your sex life.
For much of the 20th and 21st centuries, women's sexuality was an uncharted territory in science, studied far less frequently--and far less seriously--than its male counterpart. That is, until Emily Nagoski's Come As You Are, which used groundbreaking science and research to prove that the most important factor in creating and sustaining a sex life filled with confidence and joy is not what the parts are or how they're organized but how you feel about them.
In the years since the book's initial publication, countless women have learned through Nagoski's accessible and informative guide that things like stress, mood, trust, and body image are not peripheral factors in a woman's sexual wellbeing; they are central to it--and that even if you don't always feel like it, you are already sexually whole by just being yourself.
This revised and updated edition continues that mission with new information and advanced research, demystifying and decoding the science of sex so that everyone can create a better sex life and discover more pleasure than you ever thought possible.
From the New York Times bestselling author of Come as You Are and co-author of Burnout comes an illuminating exploration of how to maintain a happy sex life in a long-term relationship.
In Come as You Are, Emily Nagoski, PhD, revolutionized the way we think about women’s sexuality. Now, in Come Together, Nagoski takes on a fundamentally misunderstood subject: sex in long-term relationships.
Most of us struggle at some point to maintain a sexual connection with our partner/s or spouse. And many of us are given not-very-good advice on what to do about it. In this book, Nagoski dispels the myths we’ve been taught about sex—for instance, the belief that sexual satisfaction and desire are highest at the beginning of a relationship and that they inevitably decline the longer that relationship lasts. Nagoski assures us that’s not true.
So, what is true? Come Together isn’t about how much we want sex, or how often we’re having it; it’s about whether we like the sex we’re having. Nagoski breaks down the obstacles that impede us from enjoying sex—from stress and body image to relationship difficulties and gendered beliefs about how sex “should” be—and presents the best ways to overcome them. You’ll learn:
that “spontaneous desire” is not the kind of desire to strive for if you want to have great sex for decades
vocabulary for talking with partners about ways to get in “the mood” and how to not take it personally when “the mood” is nowhere to be found
how to understand your own and your partner’s “emotional floorplan,” so that you have a blueprint for how to get to a sexy state of mind
Written with scientific rigor, humor, and compassion, Nagoski shows us what great sex can look like, how to create it in our own lives, and what to do when struggles arise.
This accessible guide confronts myths and pressures surrounding men and sex, promoting a positive and healthy model of male sexuality that replaces traditional expectations.
The chapters in this book engage with cultural assumptions about male sexuality, from harmful early messaging, to the importance of enjoying intimacy, pleasure, and eroticism over the age of 60. The authors challenge the effects of toxic masculinity and traditional gendered roles in sex, celebrating sexual diversity, confronting double standards, and empowering men and couples to develop an equitable sexual bond. Case studies and psychosexual skill exercises are integrated throughout to make each concept personal and concrete, and incorporate the Good Enough Sex (GES) model to promote an authentic sexual self throughout the lifespan.
With a focus on mutual consent and pleasure, Contemporary Male Sexuality offers a new model of male sexuality that helps men and couples achieve a satisfying, secure, and sexual bond, replacing damaging expectations with healthy sexual values.
Confronting taboos and misunderstandings about sexuality and aging, Couple Sexuality After 60: Intimate, Pleasurable, and Satisfying motivates couples to embrace sex and sexuality in their 60s, 70s, and 80s. The book busts two extreme myths—that people over 60 cannot and should not be sexual and that the best way to be sexual is to emphasize eroticism, using sex toys, and "kinky sex".
Using a variable, flexible approach to couple sexuality based on the Good Enough Sex (GES) model, this book places the essence of sexuality in pleasure-oriented touching, not individual sex performance.
Barry and Emily McCarthy introduce a new sexual mantra of "desire/pleasure/eroticism/satisfaction" with the goal of presenting a healthy model of sexuality to replace the traditional double standard that couples learn in young adulthood. Specific chapters focus on important areas like coming to terms with the new normal, female–male sexual equity, satisfaction being about more than intercourse and orgasm, valuing synchronous and asynchronous sexuality, psychobiosocial approaches to sexuality, and more.
In addition to aging heterosexual couples, single individuals and queer couples will find this book interesting. Additionally, sexual health clinicians and sex therapists with clients over the age of 60 will find this a fascinating read.
Have you ever had a dream, but let it go because you were too afraid of failure to try?
Dancing with Your Muse is a heartfelt, motivational guide to understanding this fear, realising that you are not alone in it, and working past it to achieve your goals without inhibition.
Written in a gentle, contemplative tone, this book will encourage you to determine and strive for success on your own terms. Performers, business people, students, and everyday dreamers alike will learn to courageously choose the most direct pathways to creative success and, more importantly, personal fulfilment, holding only a desire to contribute fully to their own life.
Dealing with Depression offers a simple, easy to follow, non-judgmental and, above all, effective exploration of depression and how to manage it.
A range of strategies is outlined, including the physiological fundamentals of sleep, healthy diet and exercise as well as ideas from positive psychology that help us to take care of ourselves.
Case studies show how Jan Marsh’s approach can be tailored to the individual, enabling anyone to successfully deal with depression and get their life back.
For individuals and families/whānau affected by any kind of sudden or unexpected death, including accidental death, natural sudden death, suicide, murder and the death of a baby or child
This invaluable New Zealand handbook offers key information about events that happen after a death and people who may be involved. It contains information about trauma and grief and strategies for managing them. It includes information on supporting children and teens.
Included also are brief quotes from many New Zealanders who have experienced a sudden death. It will be a valuable up-to-date tool for professionals working alongside bereaved people and has been made possible by the support of ACC and FDANZ.
For couples interested in creating freer, more joyful, and profoundly intimate relationships, it explores the delicate balance of being true to oneself and being loved by another
This book can help couples anticipate and approach occasional or chronic conflict with compassion and creativity.
This classic text for couples interested in creating freer, more joyful, and profoundly intimate relationships explores the delicate balance of being true to oneself and being loved by another. Newly updated by the authors, here is the classic text for couples interested in creating freer, more joyful, and profoundly intimate relationships.
In their best-selling book about couple relationships, Jordan Paul and Margaret Paul explore the delicate balance of being true to oneself and being loved by another.
While couples think they are fighting about money, sex, or time, the authors reveal how such conflicts are almost always more deeply rooted and related to issues of self-protection. Offering a solid framework for conflict resolution, the authors guide couples in working through fears and false beliefs that can block the expression of loving feelings.
Stories of couples and examples of dialogue validate readers- feelings and experiences.
Down Girl is an exploration of misogyny in public life and politics.
Kate Manne argues that misogyny should not be understood primarily in terms of the hatred or hostility some men feel toward all or most women. Rather, it's primarily about controlling, policing, punishing, and exiling the "bad" women who challenge male dominance.
And it's compatible with rewarding "the good ones," and singling out other women to serve as warnings to those who are out of order. She applies her powerful theory to a wide range of social phenomena but particularly politics.
Allen Carr’s Easy Way To Stop Smoking is the world’s best-selling book on how to stop smoking, with over 13,000,000 copies sold in over 38 different languages
Allen Carr's hundred-cigarettes-a-day addiction drove him to despair, but after countless attempts to quit he disovered what the world had been waiting for - the EASY WAY TO STOP SMOKING.
Now recognised as the world's leading expert on helping smokers to quit, Allen Carr's informative, no scare tactics methods and techniques are a revelation for those desperate to kick the habit.
From gender expert and professional facilitator Kate Mangino comes Equal Partners, an informed guide about how we can all collectively work to undo harmful gender norms and create greater household equity.
As American society shut down due to Covid, millions of women had to leave their jobs to take on full-time childcare. As the country opens back up, women continue to struggle to balance the demands of work and home life. Kate Mangino, a professional facilitator for twenty years, has written a comprehensive, practical guide for readers and their partners about gender norms and household balance. Yes, part of our gender problem is structural, and that requires policy change. But much of our gender problem is social, and that requires us to change.
Quickly moving from diagnosis to solution, Equal Partners focuses on what we can do, everyday people living busy lives, to rewrite gender norms to support a balanced homelife so both partners have equal time for work, family, and self. Mangino adopts an interactive model, posing questions, and asking readers to assess their situations through guided lists and talking points. Equal Partners is broad in its definition of gender and gender roles. This is a book for all: straight, gay, trans, and non-binary, parents and grandparents, and friends, with the goal to help foster gender equality in readers' homes, with their partners, family and wider community.
From the author of the international mega-bestseller The Subtle Art of Not Giving A F*ck comes a counterintuitive guide to the problems of hope.
We live in an interesting time. Materially, everything is the best it's ever been-we are freer, healthier and wealthier than any people in human history. Yet, somehow everything seems to be irreparably and horribly f*cked-the planet is warming, governments are failing, economies are collapsing, and everyone is perpetually offended on Twitter. At this moment in history, when we have access to technology, education and communication our ancestors couldn't even dream of, so many of us come back to an overriding feeling of hopelessness.
What's going on? If anyone can put a name to our current malaise and help fix it, it's Mark Manson. In 2016, Manson published The Subtle Art of Not Giving A F*ck, a book that brilliantly gave shape to the ever-present, low-level hum of anxiety that permeates modern living. He showed us that technology had made it too easy to care about the wrong things, that our culture had convinced us that the world owed us something when it didn't-and worst of all, that our modern and maddening urge to always find happiness only served to make us unhappier. Instead, the "subtle art" of that title turned out to be a bold challenge: to choose your struggle; to narrow and focus and find the pain you want to sustain. The result was a book that became an international phenomenon, selling millions of copies worldwide while becoming the #1 bestseller in 13 different countries.
Now, in Everthing Is F*cked, Manson turns his gaze from the inevitable flaws within each individual self to the endless calamities taking place in the world around us. Drawing from the pool of psychological research on these topics, as well as the timeless wisdom of philosophers such as Plato, Nietzsche, and Tom Waits, he dissects religion and politics and the uncomfortable ways they have come to resemble one another. He looks at our relationships with money, entertainment and the internet, and how too much of a good thing can psychologically eat us alive. He openly defies our definitions of faith, happiness, freedom-and even of hope itself.
With his usual mix of erudition and where-the-f*ck-did-that-come-from humor, Manson takes us by the collar and challenges us to be more honest with ourselves and connected with the world in ways we probably haven't considered before. It's another counterintuitive romp through the pain in our hearts and the stress of our soul. One of the great modern writers has produced another book that will set the agenda for years to come.
Conflict is the top reason couples seek help—but it's also an opportunity for greater intimacy, deeper connection, and lasting love according to this essential guide from the world’s leading relationship scientists and bestselling authors of The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work and Eight Dates.
“An indispensable resource that couples will use over and over again.”—Lori Gottlieb, New York Times bestselling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone
How we fight predicts the future of our relationships. Most of us blunder into conflict without knowing what we are really fighting about and then quickly become overwhelmed by physiological responses we can’t control and emotions we don’t anticipate. The truth is the happiest and most successful couples fight—all the time. Conflict is human, and necessary.
Through decades of research, Drs. John and Julie Gottman, founders of the world-famous Love Lab, have identified the five common mistakes we make when we are at odds. In Fight Right, we learn the five secrets that help us to get back on track and harness conflict to build stronger, healthier relationships. With kindness, clarity, and a deep understanding of the struggles couples are going through, the Gottmans show us that we each have a unique conflict culture, borne of how we were raised and how we experienced past relationships, and they take us through all the possible combinations, from Avoiders, to Validators, to Volatiles, and how they can best work together.
Fight Right is an essential resource that will help couples escape the win-or-lose mentality in favor of a collaborative approach: calming down, staying connected, and really understanding, so that our fights can bring us closer.
The phenomenal classic that has changed the lives of millions of people around the globe". What are you afraid of? Public speaking; asserting yourself; making decisions; being alone; intimacy; changing jobs; interviews; going back to school; ageing; ill health; driving; dating; ending a relationship; losing a loved one; becoming a parent; leaving home, failure, believing in yourself...
Internationally renowned author Susan Jeffers has helped millions of people overcome their fears and heal the pain in their lives with her simple but profound advice. Whatever your anxieties, Feel The Fear And Do It Anyway (R) will give you the insight and tools to vastly improve your ability to handle any given situation. You will learn to live your life the way you want - so you can move from a place of pain, paralysis, depression and indecision to one of power, energy, enthusiasm and action.
An empowering and life-affirming book, Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway will help you triumph over your fears and move forward with your life.
If you have anxiety, this book is for you. If you love someone who is anxious, this book is for you.
I Quit Sugar founder and New York Times bestselling author Sarah Wilson has lived through high anxiety - including bipolar, OCD and several suicide attempts - her whole life. Perhaps like you, she grew tired of seeing anxiety as a disease that must be medicated into submission. Could anxiety be re-sewn, she asked, into a thing of beauty?
So began a seven-year journey to find a more meaningful and helpful take on anxiety. Living out of two suitcases, Sarah travelled the world, meeting with His Holiness The Dalai Lama, with Oprah's life coach, with major mental health organizations and hundreds of others in a quest to unravel the knotted ball of wool that is the anxious condition. She emerged with the very best philosophy, science and hacks for thriving with the beast.
First, We Make the Beast Beautiful is a small book with a big heart, paving the way for richer, kinder and wiser conversations about anxiety.
'Rae McDaniel is a leader in their generation, matching compassion with clear-sighted vision for a sex-positive future' Emily Nagoski, PhD, author of Come As You Are and Burnout Taking everything they know from more than a decade of working with the queer and trans community, their personal journey of gender exploration, and clinical best practices, licensed therapist, coach and speaker Rae McDaniel created the Gender Freedom Model.
A uniquely supportive narrative for gender exploration and transition grounded in queer joy, their nine-pillar model has helped thousands of transgender and nonbinary individuals explore gender through play, pleasure and freedom. And now, it can help you too. Whether you're transgender, non-binary, cisgender or still exploring, this compassionate and practical guide will help you experience your gender in new, expansive ways by teaching: ·
How to move from anxiety, self-doubt, and fear to a confident, proactive state of mind.
How to navigate discomfort and celebrate your inherent worth as you develop genuine self-love.
How to design relationships, community and a sex life that lights you up.
Practical tools to align your gender identity and expression with your most authentic self through play, pleasure and possibility.
Brimming with warmth, celebration and practical advice, Gender Magic is essential reading for anyone who yearns to step into their fullest self and imagine a life beyond gender binaries. Because you - yes YOU - are magic.
Grandparenting Grandchildren is the first guide of its kind written specifically for grandparents, and aims to help you raise well-rounded, ready-to-learn, happy grandchildren.
It covers the key influences on healthy development: movement, music, sleep and food, explaining both how they benefit the brain and how to implement them in your grandchild’s life.
Learn to build a loving, supportive relationship, while constructing essential life skills for happy, capable, and confident learners.
Highly sensitive people (HSPs), who make up some 20 per cent of the population, are individuals who both enjoy and suffer from a finely tuned neurological system
This condition can be a gift, but until HSPs master their sensitive nervous systems, they operate in a constant state of over stimulation.
Book include:
HSP in Love
HSP Survival Guide
Making Work Work for the HSP
The Highly Sensitive Child
HSP Guide to Dealing with Toxic People
Developed by Dr Sue Johnson over 20 years ago, emotionally focused therapy (EFT) de-escalates conflict, creating a safe emotional connection between partners.
In 'Hold Me Tight', Johnson presents her highly effective therapy model to the general public for the first time.
"What happened to the passion we started with? Why aren't we as close as we used to be?" PROBLEM: If you are a woman who is unfulfilled in your marriage...if you feel unheard or overburdened...if you quietly live in a state of slow-burn resentment...
If you are a man unhappy that your partner seems so unhappy with you...if you feel bewildered, unappreciated, or betrayed...this book offers a solution.
Bestselling author and nationally renowned therapist Terrence Real unearths the causes of communication blocks between men and women in this groundbreaking work. Relationships are in trouble; the demand for intimacy today must be met with new skills, and Real -- drawing on his pioneering work on male depression -- gives both men and women those skills, empowering women and connecting men, radically reversing the attitudes and emotional stumbling blocks of the patriarchal culture in which we were raised.
Filled with powerful stories of the couples Real treats, no other relationship book is as straight talking or compelling in its innovative approach to healing wounds and reconnecting partners with a new strength and understanding.
Renata Taylor-Byrne and Jim Byrne have outlined key research findings on the relationship between diet and exercise, on the one hand, and the intensity of anger, anxiety and depression emotions on the other
The book contains a list of foods that must be excluded to ensure optimal brain functioning and mood control. There is also a detailed consideration of a range of modern diets, with guidelines for developing a personalised diet; and the skills needed to change difficult dietary and exercise habits.
Renata Taylor-Byrne and Jim Byrne have outlined key research findings on the relationship between diet and exercise, on the one hand, and the intensity of anger, anxiety and depression emotions on the other. The book contains a list of foods that must be excluded to ensure optimal brain functioning and mood control. There is also a detailed consideration of a range of modern diets, with guidelines for developing a personalised diet; and the skills needed to change difficult dietary and exercise habits.
There are six parts to this book:
The first part deals with diet and nutrition and how they influence anxiety, anger and depression.
The second part of the book deals with physical exercise and how it can affect these common emotional problems.
The third part is a description of a 'stress and anxiety reduction' diet and offers guidelines for understanding different types of diets and their effects.
The fourth part shows some of the key findings from the science of nutritional deficiency, and the role of inflammation in the creation of depression.
The fifth part is a summing up of the key findings of the book, so that you can spot the most useful material that you can use for yourself - or for your clients, if you are a health-care or psychotherapeutic practitioner, counsellor or psychologist.
And the sixth part is our attempt to coach you through the process of habit change; and to give you a map to guide you through the process of accessing, learning and applying the transformative information in this book.
As a clinical psychologist, Dr Nicole LePera found herself frustrated by the limitations of traditional psychotherapy. Wanting more for her patients - and for herself - she began a journey to develop a united philosophy of mental, physical and spiritual health that equips people with the tools necessary to heal themselves. After experiencing the life-changing results herself, she began to share what she'd learned with others - and The Holistic Psychologist was born.
Now Dr LePera is ready to share her much-requested protocol with the world. In How to Do the Work, she offers both a manifesto for self-healing and an essential guide to creating a more vibrant, authentic, and joyful life. Drawing on the latest research from both scientific research and healing modalities, Dr LePera helps us recognise how adverse experiences and trauma in childhood live with us, keeping us stuck engaging in patterns of codependency, emotional immaturity, and trauma bonds. Unless addressed, these self-sabotaging behaviours can quickly become cyclical, leaving people feeling unhappy, unfulfilled, and unwell.
In How to Do the Work, Dr LePera offers readers the support and tools that will allow them to break free from destructive behaviours to reclaim and recreate their lives. Nothing short of a paradigm shift, this is a celebration of empowerment that will forever change the way we approach mental wellness and self-care.
At 18, Paul Wood thought he had lost everything. He had committed an act he knew would send him to prison for many years. To a young man like Paul, it might as well have been for the rest of his life.
Plunged into a nightmarish world of extreme violence, solitary confinement, gang allegiances, drugs, vindictive wardens and regular stabbings, Paul spent the next 11 years confined in some of New Zealand's toughest jails.
Based on an account of his experiences he wrote while still inside, How to Escape from Prison chronicles Paul's road to redemption and a new life as a doctor of psychology, helping others strive to fulfil their potential and develop the resilience to flourish, even in adversity. This is a gripping read about a man who sank to the depths of despair, before scaling the heights of true freedom.
'Paul's transformation is unbelievable. We are sometimes brought up to think a zebra can't change its stripes. Paul Wood's story is proof that anyone can change. It gives you great courage that you can do anything.' - Sir John Kirwan
In the 1950s and 1960s, Jack LaLanne revolutionized the physical fitness and health industry by promoting and teaching exercise and nutrition
Today, we complete the fitness revolution with Innercise: a comprehensive guide to science-based mental and emotional techniques to strengthen your mindset and unleash the hidden power of your brain.
Lack of knowledge or skill is not what really holds you back. It is your mindset, emotional blocks, and deeply ingrained habits that you must release to clear the path to your greatest victories and successes. With Innercise, you'll learn to change your habitual patterns, and eliminate disempowering emotions like:
Fear of failure or success
Fear of being ashamed, embarrassed or judged
Low self-worth and self-esteem
Negativity and pessimism
Lack of confidence and certainty
Fear of disappointing yourself or others
Your limiting beliefs, stories, traumas and excuses are nothing more than reinforced subconscious patterns that cause you to think, feel, and consistently behave in ways that produce the same results again and again.
Now, cutting-edge technology and the science of neuroplasticity have finally unlocked the door to breaking free from these patterns. My hope in writing this book is that it will empower you to recognize and release whatever is holding you back from your fullest potential and the grandest vision for your life.
This book is for the individual who knows they are capable of achieving more wealth, greater health and business or career success yet for some reason, they haven't yet cracked the code to unlocking their fullest abilities and skills.
Innercise will help you understand how to master your inner game, so your outer game and results align with the internal vision you have for your life and family.
A neurosurgeon's true story of the life-changing magic of mindfulness and compassion that inspired the hit K-pop band BTS
The day that 12-year-old James Doty walked in to his local magic shop is the day that changed his life. Once the neglected son of an alcoholic father and a mother with chronic depression, he has gone on to become a leading neurosurgeon, based at Stanford University. He credits Ruth for this incredible turnaround: the remarkable woman who devoted the summer to transforming his mind and opening his heart.
In this uplifting memoir, Jim explains the visualisation techniques Ruth taught him that gave him the self-esteem to imagine a new future for himself. He examines the science behind mindfulness and why the skills he learned - of focus and attention - now help him to think fast and keep calm in the operating theatre. And he shows us what is possible when you start to change your brain and your heart.
Into the Magic Shop imparts some powerful life lessons about how to live better, and inspires us to believe that we all have inside us the capacity to change our own destiny.
'I'm sure many readers will be moved by this inspiring story to open their hearts and see what they too can do for others' - His Holiness the Dalai Lama
Support children in learning to manage anxiety, and help them take crucial steps to understanding and dealing with their emotions
It’s tough to help an anxious child. Psychologist Lynn Jenkins knows this, from professional experience, and from being a mother! In Lessons of a Little Anxious Creature, she has created an essential emotional resource that encourages children to develop strategies for anxiety management, by discovering new, useful ways to think about their worries.
With this engaging book, you can support children in learning to manage anxiety, and help them take crucial steps to understanding and dealing with their emotions. It’s a fun and innovative way of building resilience, a foundation that will not only benefit kids now, but for the rest of their lives.
The New York Times bestseller from the author of Chasing the Scream, offering a radical new way of thinking about depression and anxiety
There was a mystery haunting award-winning investigative journalist Johann Hari. He was thirty-nine years old, and almost every year he had been alive, depression and anxiety had increased in Britain and across the Western world. Why?
He had a very personal reason to ask this question. When he was a teenager, he had gone to his doctor and explained that he felt like pain was leaking out of him, and he couldn't control it or understand it. Some of the solutions his doctor offered had given him some relief-but he remained in deep pain.
So, as an adult, he went on a forty-thousand-mile journey across the world to interview the leading experts about what causes depression and anxiety, and what solves them. He learned there is scientific evidence for nine different causes of depression and anxiety-and that this knowledge leads to a very different set of solutions: ones that offer real hope.
What makes sex magnificent? What are the qualities of extraordinary erotic intimacy and what are the elements that help to bring it about? Is great sex the stuff that people remember nostalgically from the "honeymoon" phase of their relationships, or can sex improve over time?
Magnificent Sex is based on the largest, in-depth interview study ever conducted with people who are having extraordinary sex. It gathers the nuggets for remarkable sex from the "experts", distilling them into an attainable blueprint for ordinary lovers who want to make erotic intimacy grow over the course of a lifetime. Looking at factors including individual and relational qualities, empathic communication and the myths and realities of magnificent sex, this book offers accessible and evidence-based guidance for lovers and therapists alike.
It is replete with frank and often humorous interviews with straight and LGBTQ individuals and couples, those who are "vanilla" and "kinky", monogamous and consensually non-monogamous and healthy and chronically ill. This illuminating book explores the implications of the findings to develop a model that effectively tackles the common problems of low desire and frequency. The "cure" for low desire is to create desirable sex.
You can also purchase at this link.
We all want to make the most of our relationship. We hope it will be the centre of joy and satisfaction in our life. Yet so often we end up hurt, frustrated or resentful.
If you've wondered why your relationship has stalled or why you find intimate partnerships so hard; why you behave the way you do or why you can't make sense of what your partner does, Make Love Work explains it all. It gives you the tools you need to be successful in love -from preventing your insecurities and neurobiology from wrecking your relationship to being a team player and handling conflict well.
There are practical strategies for handling common areas of stress: fairness, sex and intimacy, parenting, money and setting boundaries. Plus, excellent advice on the really tough issues: infidelity, abuse, major stresses, loss and grief.
Make Love Work is your essential bible for making your relationship the best it can be.
A New York City therapist examines the paradoxical relationship between domesticity and sexual desireand explains what it takes to bring lust home.
One of the world's most respected voices on erotic intelligence, Esther Perel offers a bold, provocative new take on intimacy and sex. Mating in Captivity invites us to explore the paradoxical union of domesticity and sexual desire, and explains what it takes to bring lust home.
Drawing on more than twenty years of experience as a couples therapist, Perel examines the complexities of sustaining desire. Through case studies and lively discussion, Perel demonstrates how more exciting, playful, and even poetic sex is possible in long-term relationships. Wise, witty, and as revelatory as it is straightforward, Mating in Captivity is a sensational book that will transform the way you live and love.
Matt Haig is an English novelist and journalist. He has written both fiction and non-fiction for children and adults, often in the speculative fiction genre.
Some fantastic non fiction book include:
Humans: An A-Z: Whether you are planning a high level of human interaction or just a casual visit to the planet, this user-guide to the human race will help you translate their sayings, understand exotic concepts such as 'democracy' and 'sofas', and make sense of their habits and bizarre customs. A phrase book, a dictionary and a survival guide, this book unravels all the oddness, idiosyncrasies and wonder of the species, allowing everyone to make the most of their time on Earth.
Reasons to Stay Alive: Aged 24, Matt Haig's world caved in. He could see no way to go on living. This is the true story of how he came through crisis, triumphed over an illness that almost destroyed him and learned to live again. A moving, funny and joyous exploration of how to live better, love better and feel more alive, Reasons to Stay Alive is more than a memoir. It is a book about making the most of your time on earth.
The Comfort Book: Reflections on hope, survival and the messy miracle of being alive. It is a strange paradox, that many of the clearest, most comforting life lessons are learned while we are at our lowest. But then we never think about food more than when we are hungry and we never think about life rafts more than when we are thrown overboard. The Comfort Book is a collection of consolations learned in hard times and suggestions for making the bad days better. Drawing on maxims, memoir and the inspirational lives of others, these meditations celebrate the ever-changing wonder of living. This is for when we need the wisdom of a friend or a reminder we can always nurture inner strength and hope, even in our busy world. A book of timeless comfort for modern minds.
The bestselling author of How to Escape from Prison, prisoner-turned-psychologist Paul Wood on developing the mental strength and fitness to take on all of life's challenges
Getting and staying mentally fit, just like getting and maintaining a high level of physical fitness, involves hard work, effort, and consistency. Our level of mental fitness determines how effectively we can flourish through adversity, realise our potential, and be happier with our lives - regardless of what the universe has in store.
We all know about mental stress (or we think we do). We've definitely all experienced it, and none of us like it. Yet this is not a threat to be avoided. Mental stress is perfectly analogous to physical stress: it is the mind's way of telling us that what we are attempting to perform is challenging our resource. This is a catalyst for growth, and a sign we are pursuing our potential. When we experience stress, we have a choice: we can heed that signal and give up - after all, we're meant to stay in our psychic comfort zone all the time, right? Or we can recognise the discomfort we are feeling is simply nature's way of enabling us to rise to the occasion.
In Mental Fitness you will learn how to:
Increase your mental fitness, just as you would increase your physical fitness
Get closer to your potential by working proactively to maintain your mental fitness
Experience the right level of stress (this is what makes us get fitter)
Cope effectively for longer before you get fatigued or exhausted (it doesn't mean you don't feel the struggle)
Pay attention to the indicators of fatigue to avoid burnout and unnecessary misery
In Mind Power Into the 21st Century, John Kehoe has articulated a set of life-changing principles for charting a course to success and happiness
Mind Power Into the 21st Century presents the reader with a practical guide to harness the powers of your subconscious mind, tap into your creativity, build and maintain fulfilling relationships, and improve your self-image. Entertaining and informative, this is a must-read for anyone who truly wants to live life to its fullest.
To help men break the pattern of seeking approval as a motivation for their life decisions (and end the passive-aggressive pattern)
Originally published as an e-book that became a controversial media phenomenon, No More Mr. Nice Guy! landed its author, a certified marriage and family therapist, on The O'Reilly Factor and the Rush Limbaugh radio show. Dr. Robert Glover has dubbed the "Nice Guy Syndrome" trying too hard to please others while neglecting one's own needs, thus causing unhappiness and resentfulness.
It's no wonder that unfulfilled Nice Guys lash out in frustration at their loved ones, claims Dr. Glover. He explains how they can stop seeking approval and start getting what they want in life, by presenting the information and tools to help them ensure their needs are met, to express their emotions, to have a satisfying sex life, to embrace their masculinity and form meaningful relationships with other men, and to live up to their creative potential.
"Every day, we face challenges in relationships, sexuality, money, work, and health. While there is a wealth of information and advice available on all of these subjects, we still have trouble turning knowing into doing.
Here, Dan Millman presents a peaceful warrior's way to turn our intentions into action, our challenges into strength, and our life experiences into wisdom. Based on the premise that by changing ourselves we can change the world, No Ordinary Moments presents simple yet powerful ways to balance our body, liberate our mind, accept our emotions, and open our heart."
"A playful, enlightening, and creative collection (Spirituality and Practice) of spiritual lessons, anecdotes, and thoughts on the Divine's intervention in our lives
"What if the Divine is constantly igniting roadside flares to get our attention? What if there actually is a Supreme Organizing Principle with an unbridled sense of humor? And what if we each have this ardent inner suitor who's writing us love letters every day that often go unopened?" Whether we know it or not, we all experience the touch of the Divine in our lives every single day.
After twenty-five years spent consulting and advising tens of thousands of people from all over the world, Tosha Silver realized that almost all of us have similar concerns: "How do I stop worrying? How can I feel safe? Why do I feel so alone?" and often, "Who am I really?" For the passionately spiritual and the bemusedly skeptical alike, she created Outrageous Openness.
This delightful book, filled with wisdom and fresh perspectives, helps create a relaxed, trusting openness in the reader to discover answers to life's big questions as they spontaneously arise. Outrageous Openness opens the door to a profound truth: By allowing the Divine to lead the way, we can finally put down the heavy load of hopes, fears, and opinions about how things should be. We learn how to be guided to take the right actions at the right time, and to enjoy the spectacular show that is our life.
A bullsh*t free perspective and a no-frills account of anxiety from the front line.Through the filtered lens of social media, it may seem like life's a peach, but for lots of people - journalist and author Caroline Foran included - anxiety is always bubbling beneath the surface. Here, she chronicles her experiences. From being unable to cope with the thought of venturing outside, to walking away from her fast-paced job, to the different, and sometimes controversial, treatments available - from Cognitive Behavioural Therapy to acupuncture to medication - Caroline shows us how she eventually found a way of owning her anxiety so that it doesn't own her.With extensive research and help from the experts, Owning It is written with honesty and a bullsh*t-free perspective; consider it your ultimate, practical guide that aims to get you feeling good again.
All children go through periods of poor behaviour, so parents need strategies to manage this. In this practical guide, Dr Sarah Hughes offers a warm and commonsense approach all parents can benefit from.
Dr Hughes delves into the behavioural development of children and roots out just why kids can’t always behave well. She answers hard questions with real-world examples and offers easy-to-implement, realistic approaches parents can adapt to a style of parenting that suits them.
How do we make social justice the most pleasurable human experience? How can we awaken within ourselves desires that make it impossible to settle for anything less than a fulfilling life? Author and editor Adrienne Maree Brown finds the answer in something she calls "pleasure activism," a politics of healing and happiness that explodes the dour myth that changing the world is just another form of work.
Drawing on the black feminist tradition, she challenges us to rethink the ground rules of activism. Her mindset-altering essays are interwoven with conversations and insights from other feminist thinkers, including Audre Lorde, Joan Morgan, Cara Page, Sonya Renee Taylor, and Alexis Pauline Gumbs. Together they cover a wide array of subjects--from sex work to climate change, from race and gender to sex and drugs--building new narratives about how politics can feel good and how what feels good always has a complex politics of its own.
Building on the success of her popular Emergent Strategy, brown launches a new series of the same name with this volume, bringing readers books that explore experimental, expansive, and innovative ways to meet the challenges that face our world today.
Books that find the opportunity in every crisis Adrienne Maree Brown, author of Emergent Strategy and co-editor of Octavia's Brood, is a social justice facilitator focused on black liberation, a doula/healer, and a pleasure activist. She lives in Detroit.
Have you ever left a nerve-racking challenge and immediately wished for a do over? Maybe after a job interview, a performance, or a difficult conversation? The very moments that require us to be genuine and commanding can instead cause us to feel phony and powerless. Too often we approach our lives' biggest hurdles with dread, execute them with anxiety, and leave them with regret.
By accessing our personal power, we can achieve "presence," the state in which we stop worrying about the impression we're making on others and instead adjust the impression we've been making on ourselves. As Harvard professor Amy Cuddy's revolutionary book reveals, we don't need to embark on a grand spiritual quest or complete an inner transformation to harness the power of presence. Instead, we need to nudge ourselves, moment by moment, by tweaking our body language, behavior, and mind-set in our day-to-day lives.
Amy Cuddy has galvanized tens of millions of viewers around the world with her TED talk about "power poses." Now she presents the enthralling science underlying these and many other fascinating body-mind effects, and teaches us how to use simple techniques to liberate ourselves from fear in high-pressure moments, perform at our best, and connect with and empower others to do the same.
Brilliantly researched, impassioned, and accessible, Presence is filled with stories of individuals who learned how to flourish during the stressful moments that once terrified them. Every reader will learn how to approach their biggest challenges with confidence instead of dread, and to leave them with satisfaction instead of regret.
Purposeful Breathing is a practical, user-friendly guide to simple breathing skills that can rapidly reduce states you don’t want and increase states you do want. For anyone suffering from anxiety, feeling calmer can happen in a breath or two.
For anyone wanting to boost performance, the right breathing skills will help them to get into ‘the zone’. The book also teaches breathing skills for longer term health and healing, informed by new discoveries from psychology and neuroscience.
In this frank, funny and poignant book, transgender activist Juno Roche discusses sex, desire and dating with leading figures from the trans and non-binary community. Calling out prejudices and inspiring readers to explore their own concepts of intimacy and sexuality, the first-hand accounts celebrate the wonder and potential of trans bodies and push at the boundaries of how society views gender, sexuality and relationships.
Empowering and necessary, this collection shows all trans people deserve to feel brave, beautiful and sexy.
Developed from Chantal Hofstee's highly successful book, Mindfulness on the run, and drawing on her years of experience as a clinical psychologist and executive coach, Renew Your Mind is the essential guide to rewiring your brain so that you can lead a rich and rewarding life that leaves you energized, healthy and happy.
Few of us truly enjoy our day-to-day lives. Instead, we run around chasing our ever-growing to-do list, and end up feeling tired and anxious. This is a double tragedy, because failing to enjoy the good parts of our lives doesn't only dampen our happiness but also makes us less able to change the parts we don't like. 'Renew Your Mind' is a program that was initially designed by Chantal to bring her own life back on track. Then she saw how effective it was at helping many of clients reduce stress and enjoy life more.
The quick and effective program incorporates the latest neuroscience as well as aspects of mindfulness to give you insights into the brain and techniques that will enable you to improve brain function, and create a calmer, more focused mind. The result is greater productivity, increased efficiency, reduced anxiety, enhanced creativity, and improved relationships. Packed full of real-life case studies and practical exercises that can be done in minutes, Renew Your Mind will put you on the path to the life you've always wanted!
Bestselling author and clinician Gabor Maté proposes a radical new theory on the ADD epidemic Scattered Minds explodes the myth of attention deficit disorder as genetically based - and offers real hope and advice for children and adults who live with the condition. Gabor Maté is a revered physician who specializes in neurology, psychiatry and psychology - and himself has ADD. With wisdom gained through years of medical practice and research, Scattered Minds is a must-read for parents - and for anyone interested how experiences in infancy shape the biology and psychology of the human brain. Scattered Minds
Demonstrates that ADD is not an inherited illness, but a reversible impairment and developmental delay
Explains that in ADD, circuits in the brain whose job is emotional self-regulation and attention control fail to develop in infancy - and why
Shows how 'distractibility' is the psychological product of life experience
Allows parents to understand what makes their ADD children tick, and adults with ADD to gain insights into their emotions and behaviours
Expresses optimism about neurological development even in adulthood
Presents a programme of how to promote this development in both children and adults
A self-paced journal offering guidance to those seeking reconnection with their pleasure, featuring 150+ prompts to help readers define sensuality for themselves.
Pleasure transcends sexuality; Sensual Self is here to help you embrace it. This guided journal is a self-written manual for your unique sensuality. With interactive, thought-provoking questions, you'll be guided to map and explore the inner landscape of your body--the textures, shapes, tempos, and temperatures that bring you bliss.
Sensual Self allows ample room to record your process and express yourself, giving you space for intimate conversations with yourself surrounding your pleasure and desires. 150+ prompts and exercises will help you focus on grounding yourself, checking in with your mind and body, self-acceptance, self-care, and body consciousness--from "In what ways do you keep your sensuality hidden?" to "What does an enthusiastic 'yes!' feel like in your body?"
This journal is the culmination of Sexuality Doula(R) and sex educator Ev'Yan Whitney's body of work. Sensual Self fulfills their mission to liberate individuals by guiding them to rediscover their sensuality and explore their sexuality.
A guide to raising sexually healthy, informed, empowered young people
Sex Positive Talks to Have With Kids is your guide to creating an open, shame-free connection with the young people in your world. These talks will help caregivers create the kind of bond that keeps kids safer, empowered, and returning to you for support along their journey.
Melissa Carnagey, renowned sexuality educator for youth and families, walks you through over 150 conversation starters, reflection exercises, and activities you can begin implementing at every age and stage on topics such as: bodies, consent, pleasure, sex, menstruation, gender, sexual orientation, safe & unsafe touch, pornography, feelings, relationships, and media literacy.
This inclusive, medically accurate, comprehensive guide is perfect for any parent or caregiver that's ready to normalize the talks and be that trusted adult we all needed growing up.
Cycles repeat until one person has the courage to say, 'This stops with me.' Mataio (Matt) Faafetai Malietoa Brown offers the men in his barbershop a haircut with a difference- a safe space to be seen and heard without judgement.
As the creator of My Fathers Barbers, Matt has inspired a new generation of New Zealand men to break free from the cycle of abuse - and those men have in turn inspired Matt and his wife, Sarah, to create the global anti-violence movement She Is Not Your Rehab.
In this book, Matt shares his own story and those of his clients- how they survived family violence and abuse, and how they were able to find healing and turn their lives around. He introduces the people and concepts that have helped him heal and gives readers the tools they need to begin their own journeys. She is Not Your Rehab demonstrates the power of vulnerability and honesty in addressing pain and shame, and shows how anyone can empower themselves by taking responsibility for their own healing.
Top specialist clinical psychologist Dr Sarah Hughes delivers new practical, immediate strategies for parents living with potentially difficult, rebellious, or irresponsible teenage daughters.
Supported by real-life examples, studies and research into the adolescent brain, Hughes’ solutions will help mothers and fathers grow a stubborn, reckless or challenging teenager into a well-adjusted, respectful, and self-sufficient young woman.
Sleep is fundamental to our health and wellbeing. In Sleep Sense, international sleep expert Dr Katharina Lederle draws on the latest research to explore how sleep is connected to each of the three pillars of successful living: physical health, cognitive performance, and emotional wellbeing. She then provides readers with a ‘menu’ of healthy sleep options from which they can choose in order to effectively establish better sleep habits that improve day-to-day health and wellbeing.
The Body Is Not An Apology
The Power of Radical Self-Love
"To build a world that works for everyone, we must first make the radical decision to love every facet of ourselves. . . . 'The body is not an apology' is the mantra we should all embrace." --Kimberlé Crenshaw, legal scholar and founder and Executive Director, African American Policy Forum
Humans are a varied and divergent bunch with all manner of beliefs, morals, and bodies. Systems of oppression thrive off our inability to make peace with difference and injure the relationship we have with our own bodies.
The Body Is Not an Apology offers radical self-love as the balm to heal the wounds inflicted by these violent systems. World-renowned activist and poet Sonya Renee Taylor invites us to reconnect with the radical origins of our minds and bodies and celebrate our collective, enduring strength. As we awaken to our own indoctrinated body shame, we feel inspired to awaken others and to interrupt the systems that perpetuate body shame and oppression against all bodies. When we act from this truth on a global scale, we usher in the transformative opportunity of radical self-love, which is the opportunity for a more just, equitable, and compassionate world--for us all.
This second edition includes stories from Taylor's travels around the world combating body terrorism and shines a light on the path toward liberation guided by love. In a brand new final chapter, she offers specific tools, actions, and resources for confronting racism, sexism, ableism, homophobia, and transphobia. And she provides a case study showing how radical self-love not only dismantles shame and self-loathing in us but has the power to dismantle entire systems of injustice. Together with the accompanying workbook, Your Body Is Not an Apology, Taylor brings the practice of radical self-love to life.
Is your heart fluttering in anticipation? Is your stomach tight with nerves? Are you falling in love? Feeling a bit miffed? Are you curious (perhaps about this book)? Do you have the heebie-jeebies? Are you antsy with iktsuarpok? Or giddy with depaysement?
The Book of Human Emotions is a gleeful, thoughtful collection of 156 feelings, both rare and familiar. Each has its own story, and reveals the strange forces which shape our rich and varied internal worlds. In reading it, you'll discover feelings you never knew you had (like basorexia, the sudden urge to kiss someone), uncover the secret histories of boredom and confidence, and gain unexpected insights into why we feel the way we do.
From the 5 Love Languages world - the workplace manual
Based on the #1 New York Times bestseller The 5 Love Languages(R)(over 12 million copies sold).
Dramatically improve workplace relationships simply by learning your coworkers' language of appreciation.
This book will give you the tools to improve staff morale, create a more positive workplace, and increase employee engagement. How? By teaching you to effectively communicate authentic appreciation and encouragement to employees, co-workers, and leaders. Most relational problems in organizations flow from this question: do people feel appreciated? This book will help you answer "Yes!"
A bestseller--having sold over 300,000 copies and translated into 16 languages--this book has proven to be effective and valuable in diverse settings. Its principles about human behavior have helped businesses, non-profits, hospitals, schools, government agencies, and organizations with remote workers.
PLUS! Each book contains a free access code for taking the online Motivating By Appreciation (MBA) Inventory (does not apply to purchases of used books). The assessment identifies a person's preferred languages of appreciation to help you apply the book. When supervisors and colleagues understand their coworkers' primary and secondary languages, as well as the specific actions they desire, they can effectively communicate authentic appreciation, thus creating healthy work relationships and raising the level of performance across an entire team or organization.
Take your team to the next level by applying The 5 Languages of Appreciation in the Workplace.
Is it even possible to be sane, calm and connected in the chaos of parenting? Yes!
Somewhere in our over-scheduled and frantic lives we’ve lost our intuition around how to bring up kids. Our children come with all they need to flourish to their full potential, and yet we’ve accessorised the parent-child relationship beyond recognition, creating a world of stress for parents and kids.
The Mindful Parent changes all that. It’s a timely and liberating journey back to the heart of what really matters — a deep and lasting relationship with our children. Its unique approach leads us to that deep connection by weaving together the latest in neuroscience, personal story and deceptively simple strategies that are so kind and effective it’s hard not to use them. Each chapter reexamines a different area of our parenting lives — our busyness and stress levels; our more difficult emotions; our challenging core beliefs; our essential connection with our children; our children’s tricky emotions; and the struggle of conflict-management. There is more un-learning than learning in this book. It will be read with a huge sigh of relief, a new sense of joy and a realisation that the expertise to parent well is already deep within each one of us.
Shirley Pastiroff is a counsellor, mindfulness trainer and parent coach. She has trained thousands of parents in the techniques described in this book, and now works across the education and commercial sectors as well as with individuals and families. Shirley is a former BBC documentary-maker and lives in Auckland with her husband and five children.
A book that changes everything - from the legendary Dr Gabor Maté 'It all starts with waking up... to what our bodies are expressing and our minds are suppressing' Western countries invest billions in healthcare, yet mental illness and chronic diseases are on a seemingly unstoppable rise.
Nearly 70% of Americans are now on prescription drugs. So what is 'normal' when it comes to health? Over four decades of clinical experience, renowned physician and addiction expert Dr Gabor Maté has seen how health systems neglect the role that trauma exerts on our bodies and our minds. Medicine often fails to treat the whole person, ignoring how today's culture stresses our bodies, burdens our immune systems and undermines emotional balance.
Now, in his most ambitious and urgent book yet, Dr Maté connects the dots between our personal suffering and the pressures of modern-day living - with disease as a natural reflection of a life spent growing further and further apart from our true selves. But, with deep compassion, he also shows us a pathway to health and healing. Filled with stories of people in the grip of illness or in the triumphant wake of recovery, this life-affirming book, co-written with his son Daniel, proves true health is possible - if we are willing to reconnect with each other and our authentic selves.
The New Male Sexuality addresses the most urgent questions of men today - and of the women who love them.
Bernie Zilbergeld reports findings from his twenty years as a psychologist specializing in human sexuality, as well as those other experts in the field, and shares his own and his clients' experiences. The result is the most comprehensive guide ever to enhancing desire and arousal, focusing on pleasure rather than performance, and keeping sex exciting and fulfilling.
Clear, comprehensive, witty, and refreshingly realistic, The New Male Sexuality is destined to be a classic of the nineties and beyond.
Eckhart Tolle is one of today's most inspiring teachers. An international bestselling phenomenon, this book has inspired a generation and is as popular today as it was a decade ago when first published.
Accessing the deepest self, the true self, can be learned, he says, by freeing ourselves from the conflicting, unreasonable demands of the mind and living ‘present, fully and intensely, in the Now’.
To make the journey into The Power of Now we will need to leave our analytical mind and its false created self, the ego, behind. Although the journey is challenging, Eckhart Tolle offers simple language and a question and answer format to guide us.
Surrender to the present moment, where problems do not exist. It is here we find our joy, are able to embrace our true selves and discover that we are already complete and perfect. If we are able to be fully present and take each step in the Now we will be opening ourselves to the transforming experience of THE POWER OF NOW. It's a book to be revisited again and again.
New York Times Bestseller In this generation-defining self-help guide, a superstar blogger cuts through the crap to show us how to stop trying to be "positive" all the time so that we can truly become better, happier people. For decades, we've been told that positive thinking is the key to a happy, rich life. "F**k positivity," Mark Manson says. "Let's be honest, shit is f**ked and we have to live with it." In his wildly popular Internet blog, Manson doesn't sugarcoat or equivocate. He tells it like it is-a dose of raw, refreshing, honest truth that is sorely lacking today. The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k is his antidote to the coddling, let's-all-feel-good mindset that has infected American society and spoiled a generation, rewarding them with gold medals just for showing up. Manson makes the argument, backed both by academic research and well-timed poop jokes, that improving our lives hinges not on our ability to turn lemons into lemonade, but on learning to stomach lemons better. Human beings are flawed and limited-"not everybody can be extraordinary, there are winners and losers in society, and some of it is not fair or your fault."
Manson advises us to get to know our limitations and accept them. Once we embrace our fears, faults, and uncertainties, once we stop running and avoiding and start confronting painful truths, we can begin to find the courage, perseverance, honesty, responsibility, curiosity, and forgiveness we seek. There are only so many things we can give a f**k about so we need to figure out which ones really matter, Manson makes clear. While money is nice, caring about what you do with your life is better, because true wealth is about experience. A much-needed grab-you-by-the-shoulders-and-look-you-in-the-eye moment of real-talk, filled with entertaining stories and profane, ruthless humor, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F**k is a refreshing slap for a generation to help them lead contented, grounded lives.
The Velveteen Rabbit's journey towards becoming real - through the love of a child
He didn't mind how he looked to other people, because the nursery magic had made him Real, and when you are Real shabbiness doesn't matter.
In the nursery, only the toys that are old and wise truly understand what it means to be Real. The Velveteen Rabbit, a newcomer to the nursery, asks one of the most knowledgeable toys, the Skin Horse, what being Real means. And so begins the Velveteen Rabbit's journey towards becoming real - through the love of a child ...
Margery Williams' timeless picture book classic has been read and cherished by many generations of children and their parents and is now available in this beautiful hardback edition.
Brought to life by gorgeous and much-loved classic illustrations by William Nicholson, with a new foiled cover design, this is a wonderful keepsake gift to treasure and share.
Based on The Velveteen Rabbit - a lovely, gentle introduction to self awareness and living authentically
In The Velveteen Principles, psychotherapist Toni D'Antonio laid out the 12 principles she learned about how to live an authentic life from the classic children's book, The Velveteen Rabbit. The timeless advice, compelling anecdotes and friendly, encouraging voice immediately struck a chord with thousands of readers and made the book a surprise hit in 2004.
This limited edition holiday release is a celebration of renewal and living a life that is true to one's aspirations. This beautiful gift book will be treasured for holidays to come.
The Winner's Bible shows you how to permanently rewire your brain and transform your life using the same groundbreaking tools neuroscientist Dr Kerry Spackman customized for elite athletes, Olympic champions and businesspeople. When he was asked by a top Formula 1 team to help a champion driver who was struggling, despite having been treated by some of the best Sports Psychologists, Psychotherapists and Counsellors available, Dr Spackman quickly realised a new approach was needed. this approach was so successful, he was soon swamped by demand.
The only solution was to write his tools and techniques down in a single, easy to read book so that everyone could have access to the same tools the World Champions had. the Winner's Bible is a riveting read filled with real life examples you'll never forget.
Dr Spackman shows you how to "Rewire your Brain for Permanent Change". He explains why most self-help books don't work and why his program does. the proof of his tools is demonstrated in the lives of the people he's changed. A fully revised and updated edition.
Daryl Brougham's story of more than 30 foster homes in New Zealand
Best-selling book on a young man's traumatic childhood in foster care. Sold over 4,000 copies in Australia and New Zealand in its first four months. In 1990, at the age of ten, Daryl Brougham was told by a social worker he was useless and would end up in jail. By 1997, he had attended 27 schools, been through over 30 social workers and lived in more than 30 different foster homes. During his 18 years as a state ward he suffered repeated sexual, physical, emotional and psychological abuse. Rising above all the abuse, Daryl proved that social worker wrong. A quality New Zealand book.
Improving your life is much easier than you think. Whether it's losing weight, sleeping more, or restoring your work/life balance - the secret is to start small.
For years, we've been told that being more healthy and productive is a matter of willpower: that we should follow the latest fad and make constant changes to our lifestyles. But whether in our diets, fitness plans or jobs, radical overhauls never work. Instead we should start with quick wins - and embed new, tiny habits into our everyday routines.
The world expert on this is Silicon Valley legend BJ Fogg, pioneering research psychologist and founder of the iconic Behaviour Design Lab at Stanford. Now anyone can use his science-based approach to make changes that are simple to achieve and sticky enough to last.
In the hugely anticipated Tiny Habits, BJ Fogg shows us how to change our lives for the better, one tiny habit at a time. Based on twenty years research and his experience coaching over 40,000 people, it cracks the code of habit formation. Focus on what is easy to change, not what is hard; focus on what you want to do, not what you should do. At the heart of this is a startling truth - that creating happier, healthier lives can be easy, and surprisingly fun.
A step by step guide to help you decide whether to stay in or get out of your relationship
There are many books that promise to help you fix a bad relationship. This groundbreaking bestseller is the first one to help you choose whether you should even try--or if you need to go. Psychotherapist Mira Kirshenbaum draws on years of research and her work with real-life couples to help you make the right decision. She shows you how to diagnose your unique situation with self-analysis and questions like these, which get to the very heart of your problems: - What sins are forgivable and which ones are unpardonable?
Is your partner questioning your opinions to the point where you doubt yourself?
What is your sex life really like, and how important is it?
Is there real love left between you, and how does it stack up against all that you find unlovable?
Mira Kirshenbaum provides expert guidelines that are the key to making all your choices, concrete steps that you can implement right now, and the ultimate way to determine your personal bottom line--what you need to be happy. This remarkably insightful and probing guide offers advice that lets you see the truth about your relationship--and with wisdom and compassion, it helps you act with the confidence of knowing that whether you decide to go or stay, you are doing the very best thing.
Despite the increasing visibility of trans and non-binary folx in media, political representation, and popular culture, their sexual lives and erotic embodiments are woefully under-attended-to in both scholarship and clinical practice. The aim of this book is to equip providers with both conceptual frameworks and concrete tools for better engaging their trans, non-binary, and gender expansive clients in pleasure-centered discussions of sexual health.
Challenging the dominant images of trans sexualities that appear in the existing literature, such as an emphasis on avoiding gender dysphoria, the preservation of sexual function, or on sexual losses that may arise as a result of transition pathways, Trans Sex offers a pleasure-positive approach to working with trans clients. Providing concrete clinical practices and practical activities that utilize social justice, intersectional trans feminism, and radical queer theory as key conceptual frameworks, this groundbreaking text is designed to be accessible to a wide range of providers. This book draws on Fielding’s experiences as both a trans client/patient and as a therapist to shift and expand the conversation and includes contributions from other trans and non-binary providers working at the intersection of gender-affirmative care and sexuality.
Trans Sex seeks to move trans sexualities from the margins of gender-affirmative clinical practice, to center pleasure, and to spark creativity and empathic attunement within the client-provider relationship. Whether they be mental health or medical providers, trainees, or seasoned practitioners in gender-affirmative work or sexualities, readers will be able harness creative strategies to enhance their practice and become more imaginative providers.
Are you ready to unleash your awesome?
Drawing on strengths research and real-world experience, Daria Williamson has created this practical, easy-to-implement handbook to help you to get clarity on what you love, what you’re great at, and how you can achieve more without sacrificing your wellbeing.
Built for motivated, busy people, Unleash Your Awesome is full of simple exercises you can use to identify and leverage your strengths, and create the kind of life and work you’ve been dreaming of.
It will help if you want to find more fulfilment in your life and work, and create outstanding results while looking after your wellbeing, then it’s time to hone your strengths and unleash your awesome.
Oprah Winfrey and renowned brain development and trauma expert, Dr Bruce Perry, discuss the impact of trauma and adverse experiences and how healing must begin with a shift to asking 'What happened to you?' rather than 'What's wrong with you?'.
Through wide-ranging and often deeply personal conversation, Oprah Winfrey and Dr Perry explore how what happens to us in early childhood - both good and bad - influences the people we become. They challenge us to shift from focusing on 'What's wrong with you?' or 'Why are you behaving that way?' to asking 'What happened to you?'. This simple change in perspective can open up a new and hopeful understanding for millions about why we do the things we do, why we are the way we are, providing a road map for repairing relationships, overcoming what seems insurmountable, and ultimately living better and more fulfilling lives.
Many of us experience adversity and trauma during childhood that has lasting impact on our physical and emotional health. And as we're beginning to understand, we are more sensitive to developmental trauma as children than we are as adults. 'What happened to us' in childhood is a powerful predictor of our risk for physical and mental health problems down the road, and offers scientific insights into the patterns of behaviours so many struggle to understand.
A survivor of multiple childhood challenges herself, Oprah Winfrey shares portions of her own harrowing experiences because she understands the vulnerability that comes from facing trauma at a young age. Throughout her career, Oprah has teamed up with Dr Bruce Perry, one of the world's leading experts on childhood trauma. He has treated thousands of children, youth, and adults and has been called on for decades to support individuals and communities following high-profile traumatic events.
Now, Oprah joins forces with Dr Perry to marry the power of storytelling with the science and clinical experience to better understand and overcome the effects of trauma. In conversation throughout the book, the two focus on understanding people, behaviour, and ourselves in the context of personal experiences. They remove blame and self-shaming, and open up a space for healing and understanding. It's a subtle but profound shift in our approach to trauma, and it's one that allows us to understand our pasts in order to clear a path to our future - opening the door to resilience and healing in a proven, powerful way. Grounded in the latest brain science and brought to life through compelling narratives, this book shines a light on a much-needed path to recovery - showing us our incredible capacity to transform after adversity.
Child & youth recommended reading
This beautiful picture book takes children on a journey through emotions associated with anxiety and shows simple yet effective ways to help manage them.
At the back of the book, there is a section for parents and/or teachers to expand on Aroha's ways in more depth. Asking questions around those emotions to make it easier for children to recognise the emotion, and then a simple way to manage it.
"Aroha's Way is a beautiful, descriptive and relatable book - an important book - helping children to normalise, understand and even develop their own tools for dealing with their feelings." - Jenny Palmer, Author of Feel a Little.
Suitable for ages 5-12 years. A book that helps children label emotions associated with anxiety and provides tools to manage them. Parents/Teachers notes at the back included expanding on the story's tools.
The author is the winner of the 2018 NZ Book Awards Russell Clark Award for Illustration, and Gold Ledger Award for his book, Giants, Trolls, Witches, Beasts: Ten Tales from the Deep, Dark Woods. A beautifully created paperback children's book with 36 pages of full-colour illustrations by Craig Phillips.
Produced with the assistance of The Mental Health Foundation & Like Minds, Like Mine.
Please note, this is slightly smaller than the original size of our own published book. If you wish to order one with an embossed title and without clipping please order from www.wildlingbooks.com.
Flick is just like any other youngster. She loves to chase butterflies and jump in autumn leaves. But life at the end of Holyrood Lane is often violent and unpredictable due to the constant storms that plague her home, causing her to cringe with dread and flee whenever they strike.
Visually arresting, emotionally incisive, and ultimately uplifting, this beautifully crafted picture book provides a sensitive glimpse into one aspect of domestic violence and how it can affect young lives.
Curly teaches Loppy how to manage his worries, specifically his worries about going to school (it can be applied to any challenging situation)
Brave, the second book in the Lessons of a LAC series, provides kids with a strategy for how to face things that worry them. While kids are blessed with imagination, that can be a source of anxiety. However, it can also be tapped to help them to feel calm, confident and BRAVE!
In Brave, Curly teaches Loppy how to manage his worries, specifically his worries about going to school. However, the technique of helping children to ‘find their brave’ can be applied to any challenging situation.
A heart-warming tale about the love between a dog and their person, and a sensitive exploration of depression and anxiety
Cookie loves Girl more than anything – even chasing balls and smelling smells! Sometimes Girl is too sad to play with Cookie, but that’s okay because Cookie is good at sad. You can lick it off, you know.
With beautiful words and playful illustrations, Cookie is both a heart-warming tale about the love between a dog and their person, and a sensitive exploration of depression and anxiety. From dog-lovers to children who share Girl’s feelings, everyone can learn something from this inseparable pair.
Lucy worries about everything. She’s so skilled at worrying that she worries about things no one else even thinks about!
When a school musical is announced, Lucy wants to be part of it but is scared try out. Then, her teacher finds a part especially for her. Lucy stands proud and tall to be the best tree she can, even as her knees knock and her tummy ties in knots. Lucy’s bravery will show children everywhere that it’s okay to be worried, and they can still embrace opportunities!
Sometimes Sophie worries — not during the day when she is busy with family and friends, but at night when everything is calm and quiet. Her family all try to help, but somehow they just make her worries worse. Until her mother thinks of a new approach … that might just involve an elephant or two!
But wait, don’t think about purple elephants, whatever you do! Whimsical and humorous, this little girl’s story of finding a way to ease her worry resonates with children and parents everywhere. Don’t Think About Purple Elephants is an excellent resource for social and emotional learning for parents and teachers.
Grandma Forgets is the heart-warming story of a family bound by love as they cope with their grandma’s dementia. Over the years, the little girl has built up a treasure trove of memories of time spent with Grandma: sausages for Sunday lunch, driving in her sky-blue car to the beach, climbing her apple trees while she baked a delicious apple pie, and her comforting hugs during wild storms.
A hopeful story about a family who sometimes needs to remind their grandmother a little more often than they used to about how much they care. She might not remember any of their names but she will always know how much she is loved.
A touching story about curiosity, empathy, care of the environment, and overcoming fears
When Finn’s family plants a tree in their backyard, he feels responsible for it and worries the little sapling is cold, hungry or lonely. He tries to share his breakfast with it, offers it his scarf, and keeps it company. Just after going to bed, his nightlight goes out and Finn is plunged into darkness. But when he sees his tree standing tall and brave in the moonlight, it inspires him to be brave as well.
A touching story about curiosity, empathy, care of the environment, and overcoming fears.
A picture book with humour & heart for everyone who has ever felt like they're on the outside looking in
People don’t notice Jerry. If someone bumps into him, they don’t say sorry. If he makes a joke, no one laughs. He never gets picked last for sports teams — but that’s because he never gets picked at all. It’s like he’s invisible.
Until Molly comes along. Molly asks Jerry his opinion. She laughs with him. She sees him. This is a picture book with humour and heart for everyone who has ever felt like they’re on the outside looking in.
Making Sense of Emotions is a children's book based on understanding and coping with everyday life situations
This book not only describes the link between all senses with our emotions, but also the importance of an overall good health. The goal is to help children appreciate the simple things in and around their lives, especially since we live in a world of technology. Readers will hopefully consider the control they have over their emotions by their thoughts and actions. Making Sense of Emotions is an informative book designed to provide a better understanding of one's self and how our surroundings impact the way we feel and think. Children have a great imagination; they just need a little help learning how to use it to their advantage.
There is also an audio book available for an older audience.
Pear of Hope is the story of a little girl with cancer and her tale of recovery. This is intertwined with the growth of a pear tree, which symbolises the enigmatic concept of hope.
Told through sensitive words and gentle, beautiful illustrations, the story will comfort and inspire any children who are struggling to feel positive, whatever journey they may be on. It is a vibrant reminder of the beauty of the world around us and of the fact that, like Anna, with hope you can face any battle!
Book lives at the library and desperately wants to go outside, but is intimidated by all the things that might happen ‘out there’.
Meanwhile, Emma loves visiting the library and delights in the many adventures to be had in the stories she finds there.
When Emma meets Book, they find they are just what each other needs. Children and parents alike will enjoy this story about being brave, taking risks, and living to tell the tale!
Edward is anxious to start knight-school. He puts on his armour, prepared for battle. It’s sure to be terrifying with all those ogres and dragons about. But at school, Edward is befriended by an ogre who offers him some of her lunch. Edward soon realizes that maybe things aren’t as bad as they first seemed. In fact, his armour was holding him back. As he learns to let his guard down, magic and fun await and Edward realizes the dragons and ogres he feared are actually just like him.
The Fix-It Man is a poignant picture book that explores how a child can cope with the loss of a parent (in this case, the young girl’s mother). Repairing damaged emotions is not as straightforward as gluing a broken kite back together or sewing up a torn toy.
And grief affects all members of a family, with each responding in their own way to the loss. By sticking with her father, the young girl is able to strengthen her resilience and ability to cope with one of life’s harshest experiences.
Most children would say that the ocean is blue, but when Bowen looks at it he sees white where the waves crash, deep black on the ocean floor, and green when there’s a storm.
Bowen sees the world differently and struggles to fit in. When he turns his uniqueness into his greatest strength, however, he finds his place in the world.
Young readers, carers, teachers and psychologists alike will be inspired by this story of embracing diversity while also encouraging children to think differently.
The story of a child who has just moved house and is struggling to cope with all the changes in her life
Through the Gate tells the story of a child who has just moved house and is struggling to cope with all the changes in her life. She relates to the dilapidated house she has moved to, as she sits sad and forlorn upon its broken front step.
But, as the story unfolds, the house is gradually repaired paralleling how the child’s perception of her new situation improves. Each time the child passes ‘through the gate’, into the world beyond, she notices more of her surroundings and discovers that her new life has some wonderful things in it.
Within the illustrations is a ‘spot the difference’ game that encourages interaction with the story and develops observation skills. Younger children can be involved in spotting the more obvious changes and older children will be challenged with the more subtle transformations.
Helping children to understand what's possible if a parent has mental health challenges
When her father feels sad, a little girl finds ways to keep the bonds of love alive
Her mother says you can’t see her daddy’s hurt because it’s inside his head …
One in five adults experiences depression in their lifetime, but young children are often left in the dark when their mother or father suddenly can’t play like they used to.
Together Things helps young children to understand that, while it is okay for them to feel mad or sad about this, sometimes they must do different things together while their parent focuses on their mental health and getting better.
Hugo the monkey doesn’t like Upside-Down Fridays. His routine is the wrong way round, and school is a scary place full of uncertainty. However, with just a small gesture of friendship and understanding from Maddie the giraffe, Hugo begins to feel braver.
Upside-Down Friday reflects how helping others and accepting change can reduce childhood anxiety. With its emotive language and unique ‘upside-down’ illustrations, it is the perfect resource for building emotional resilience in children.
The Velveteen Rabbit's journey towards becoming real - through the love of a child
He didn't mind how he looked to other people, because the nursery magic had made him Real, and when you are Real shabbiness doesn't matter.
In the nursery, only the toys that are old and wise truly understand what it means to be Real. The Velveteen Rabbit, a newcomer to the nursery, asks one of the most knowledgeable toys, the Skin Horse, what being Real means. And so begins the Velveteen Rabbit's journey towards becoming real - through the love of a child ...
Margery Williams' timeless picture book classic has been read and cherished by many generations of children and their parents and is now available in this beautiful hardback edition.
Brought to life by gorgeous and much-loved classic illustrations by William Nicholson, with a new foiled cover design, this is a wonderful keepsake gift to treasure and share.
‘What if…’ are two small words that lead to uneasy feelings. But maybe they can be used for something a little more fun…
For Issy, and many more little worriers, ‘what if…’ are two small words that lead to uneasy feelings. But maybe they can be used for something a little more fun…
In this colourful adventure, ‘what ifs’ become springboards for happiness and imagination. Why worry about monsters under the bed when you could wonder what if the clouds were purple and orange and green? Children will delight in this playful exploration of words and their power to change how we feel, turning anxiety into wonder.